Monday, May 30, 2011

One night



There are some people who have this extravagant childhood where the parents stand on one leg to jump at anything their kids want.Then there are people who have this impecunious and impoverished childhood where parents can hardly meet the daily needs of their lives.Then there is this bourgeois childhood where the parents are happy to make a decent living.Mine fell in the last category.Here is just one night from my childhood....

I have a very clear picture of this night.A night which really shook me.I was in the 5th standard.My mom always loved to teach.Even though she worked in a small school she loved what she did.She was not paid more then a thousand bucks but there was this satisfaction in her.There was always this passion in her eyes and she was always full of life.She really wanted to make a difference no matter what.And on the other side was my dad who works in an Oil company and yes is paid well off to make a decent living even without my mom working.My dad is one character who is just not only dominating but also ferocious and straigh forward who hardly thinks before speaking or doing anything.He things the world has to bow down before him.He is like a person who would even break the dinning table if the food that she cooked wasn't upto his mark.And he never wanted mom to work.

I have learnt from my experience that men are naive and fail to understand what can make a women happy.Men have almost left no stone unturn to conquer the universe yet they fail to understand some simple things that women want.My dad never wanted my mom to work.He failed to understand her needs,her passion that even I could understand at such an age.This fight between mom and dad has been going on after they got married and yes arranged marriage it was.And my mom wasn't ready to sacrifice it for dad.

That night the argument grew so ugly that my dad did what I never dreamt of before.He pulled my mom by her hair and slapped her.Yes!!the shock of my life!It's still fresh in my mind and the recollection still brings tears in my eyes.The time in my watch was 12.30 and my mom left the house that moment itself.My world went black and my whole body shivered.A night it was.My little sis was sleeping and tears rolled down my eyes seeing her wake up startled.She is the only person for whom I would give my life happily.That moment itself the meaning of marriage changed for me.Till I met the love of my life.

My mom did come back the next day cause she knew she had two daughters to look after and that was the end of her career.She sacrificed it all for dad.There are these amazing sacrifices that mom's can do.Her world changed totally therafter.Yet it was amazing how her eyes were still smiling when she looked at me the next day like nothing ever happened.

:-)













Monday, May 16, 2011

Loneliness




It has been months I have really written something for myself.At this moment of total loneliness I end up writting a blog or maybe trying to just find something to make me happy.Whenever I come here I end up reading posts all about love.People are really crazy about love.Its nice to see people so happy in love.Hail O love!!

My life has turned to a point where technically,literally,physically,mentally nothing is sane.Life is indeed a big torture and once you know you have survived one there you fall into another one.The worst and the best part of my life is the loneliness that I have in profound.Worst part because everyday I come to office and find people surrounded by me with whom you can't have "the Conversation" and by "the conversation" I mean the warm connection that develops once you see a person.And then I return home to find myself again filled with emptiness and silence as I have a two bedroom flat with not a single soul to smile at.And to my added sorrow I am yet to be allocated a project in the office which means I sit all alone infront of a desktop the entire day.So here again comes loneliness.


No matter what,I miss the warmth,the happiness,the fun,the care,the love that I once had.I was once happy with my closest buddies.I miss those moments with which I can live my whole life.But lets be practical...these moments are the ones which make me crave for them more.


My love life.....I donno what a Lifepartner is supposed to mean!!Maybe this can be answered only by "the Lifepartner".Even after 5years of a relationship I don't kno the exact definition.For girls the list is basically endless but that is not important.After everything I have gone through I realize that women and men don't go together.Ofcourse you can live together but with a lot of sacrifices.I just want a friend in my lifepartner I hope it is not much to ask for.


So life is literally screwed.But trust me I would fight with every single moment of my life and one day I will be out of this depression.


I don't know how many of you would even read this...just my life's bad phase!!

Hope to get back soon....


Love you all.

Friday, May 6, 2011

A Salute!!

Tears in her eyes I could see;
Yet,couldn't find the key;
Pain she had I knew;
Words to explain were few;

The wound was very fresh;
I dare not ask her fears;
Coz she would tear my flesh
With just her silence and tears;

The stranger who came into her life
Never took her as his wife;
As his only goal was to save
The country so brave;

He left her to meet his fate;
Dreams laid shattered;
She knew her life was her mate;
Yet,her 'Country' was all that mattered!!

P.S:This is a salute to the people who sacrifice their love for the sake of their countries!